Hello friends, family, and other readers. It’s been a long time since my last entry, but the past weeks have been consummed with goodbye visits, packing, and finally, moving back to the States. I have to break the sad news- the “euromode” phase of my life is now over. For the time being.
I arrived in Bosoton last Friday night, and am now at my mother’s house in Connecticut, getting used to American life again. But not all is sad- it’s been wonderful to see my family after a year, and a trip tomorrow to NYC to visit friends and go apartment/job hunting is in order. I can eat hamburgers with no remorse, ride in a car when it’s raining (a huge luxury), and partake in the very spirted American Christmas season. I can shop at J. Crew again, and eat my Mom’s buttery scrambled eggs. I can explore Manhattan like it’s a brand new city, while simultaneously visiting friends I’ve known for years.
Yet I find there is a hole inside me, that grows deeper daily. I’ve left behind a family I’d grown extremely close to, and I’ve left behind the love of my life. I’ve left behind adventure and bicycles, new friends and easy, European living (and also strict, dinner table manners). I know I should be thrilled about my new New York City life, but it seems so different and complicated, compared to the simple living I have learned to enjoy in Holland (never thought I’d say that..) The biggest question that faces me, is how can I take all the lessons I’ve learned abroad, and incorporate them into my new life? I feel that I have changed in a million ways, and all those meaningful molments must not go to waste.
So I ask you, reader, to help me. Have you ever gone through a major change in your life, and how did you incorporate the old, to strongly build “the new you?” I know change is good, but for some reason, it’s taking longer than usual for me to adjust. xx Helen Anne